Shop What You’re Doing: i’ve got the Elm Street Blues

Hi my name is Thomas, i love Dalston Oxfam Shop and, i might as well admit now, i’m about to rip off their idea. Even though i don’t have any cassette-to-mp3 facilities just now. Sorry.

i’ve been travelling the country visiting my family for the past few days, which also doubles up as the chance to pick up a few long-unheard CDs and vinyls. My record collection is divided amongst various residences on the South coast of England, you see, with a few hundred in my Dad’s loft in Southampton, a few hundred more in my mother’s study in Bournemouth and a handful here in my room in Sussex. So, in order to make sure i had some choice cuts to upload soon (for variation) i’ve lugged home a delightful bunch of songs to play and a load of tapes in case my technological incompetence is eliminated to the extent i can put some of the various Peel sessions, Lamacq Live and tracks and festival coverage recordings up on here. i’m afraid that, as i looked upon all the compact discs teetering in mountainous towers as i unloaded them from plastic crates to read the tracklistings, i wanted to play most of them to you. So. We’ll all just have to wait.

[Edit: You remember, for instance, i said i’d play you ‘£1500 And A Bus Apology’ by Kid Carpet if i had it on me? Well now i do, so:

Kid Carpet - £1500 And A Bus Apology

Hope it was worth the wait.]

Anyway. As well as getting to see my family and the larger part of my record collection, i also got to see some of my hometown and find out how it’s changed. When i left Southampton two years ago one of the local independent record shops, Essential Music, was threatening to close down. Once a Fopp had opened at the top of the road, the faeces smashed into the fan with tremendous force and now they’ve been replaced by a Save The Children charity shop. And their selection of second-hand CDs is, i feel, rather great, considering that the stuff i left included a load of promos by the likes of Help! She Can’t Swim and Cranebuilders. So i’ll play some of what i picked up for you here, if that’s okay?



The Sinking Citizenship – Last Minute Intervention

Whoever donated the bulk of the promotional singles and EPs in this shop must have been in good contact with Fantastic Plastic considering the sheer volume of artists present on their label, such as The Sinking Citizenship. i’d not heard this lot before but it’s quite good and petulant, at times a bit Cooper Temple Clause-y and a little Mansun-like, plus it’s always a treat to have that FP logo on a disc in your hands.



Vive La Fête – Petite Putain

Vive La Fete are a group from Belgium that i recognised the name of because it was one of the names Peelie used to say (and play) a lot, they even made the 2003 Festive Fifty with their track ‘Noir Desir’. Part of the reason i’d not looked for them sooner is i wasn’t really sure what he was saying, even though i studied French and could have worked it out by translating the English ‘Long Live The Party’. i’m just a bit dim like that i suppose.



Jeremy Warmsley – 5 Verses

i’ve only seen Jeremy Warmsley live twice now, and i’m not really sure they count because one was an instore for Resident and the other was flanking Emmy The Great, so essentially i’ve only seen an acoustic set. But anyway live he is mesmerising, especially in the pin-drop atmosphere that his astounding voice often creates, but recorded he goes into intriguing electronic excursions that incorporate his bold harmonies and weepy storytelling. There was a copy of the ‘5 Interesting Lies EP’ which, happily, contains five great tracks.



Reuben – Freddy Kreuger


There also fantastically happened to be two copies of the promotional sampler for ‘Racecar Is Racecar Backwards’, the debut album from Reuben (so hurry up and you might be able to buy the other one). Ah, Reuben. Have i got some stories about Reuben. Yes actually i have (thank you for asking), seeing as they were the favourite band of two of my best friends in college. On one occasion, around about the time they’d just released ‘Let’s Stop Hanging Out’, my mate Wellie had begged her mother to drive us to Portsmouth to see them headline an outdoor one-day ‘festival’, which was essentially a handful of screamo (snort!) bands throwing themselves about in a park near the docks. The forecast was for rain and, with clouds looming, it all seemed quite surreal really, sitting on a grassy bank watching local bands shout embarrassing Americanisms as cruise liners floated away behind them. The penultimate band, who i did review but completely forget the name of now, were halfway through their set when the rain suddenly became torrential and the organisers had to rush plastic sheeting over the equipment while the audience rushed to their cars. i remember returning back as the rain cleared slightly, watching said band risking electrocution to play their final, quite haunting song under circling clouds, as lightning forked on the horizon. It was really quite beautiful, until one of the promoters came out, pushed them off stage and then did a comedic fist-fight with the sky for pissing on their parade. We did get to speak to Reuben though, which was nice, and ask when the hell their album was going to be ready. i think ‘Freddy Kreuger’ came out about a year later, and i’m still unsure how you spell it. i’m also still unsure whether there really is a member of Junkplanet in the video or whether i just imagined it.



Hoggboy – So Young

Har! This find made me more elated than probably necessary, but still, i think Hoggboy were BRILLIANT! For those of you not chuckling into your keyboards, Hoggboy were one of those bands tipped for international indie-rock stardom and yet, despite the promise, languished outside the Top 40 continuously and prevailed as the support act in the Flapper & Firkin for the rest of eternity. i even remember running to the local newsagent one Wednesday during school lunch-break, finding that ver Hogg were front page in NME’s ‘On’ section (yes i feel a bit old now) and reading in the interview that the group said, “we aren’t like other bands”. To which the journalist with them added, “Then again, other bands are shit.” They were to The Vines what Terris were to Coldplay (only two years later) and, considering the Antipodean’s progress since, that’s saying something. It’s a shame really, because i think they would have fitted in well as the more melodic contemporaries of, say, The Horrors or Xerox Teens of now. When the aforementioned Lamacq was broadcasting his final Lamacq Live programme he played ‘So Young’ and said that they were just ahead of their time - which may or may not be much solace to a band lumped into a scene (with No Name) that included the much more successful/revered Mclusky and Eighties Matchbox B-Line Disaster. [i’ve just found out the single is now deleted too, so download while you can i guess.]

i was at this point going to leave you with a track by Lifting Gear Engineer (primarily, i should confess, because of the title), from a compilation that i also picked up at the STC shop called ‘A Step In The Left Direction’ on Boobytrap Records but the CD won’t upload onto my computer. Oh well. All it leaves for me to say then is remember to support charitable thriftiness.

…Unless you want to stay here and watch the new Von Sudenfed video instead? Okay!

Put on my ravin' shoes...

Sorry we’re not about much. We miss you.

So anyway, we know New Rave (or is it Nu Rave now? i can’t keep up with the kids nowadays. i’d rather it wasn’t because Nu automatically makes me think of Nu Metal and frankly i’d rather not) is only just managing to stagger about on its feeble mashed-out legs, but there are still people wanting explanation. Basically, then, the Klaxons stuck a few keyboard sound effects onto their guitar-centric song(s) and it’s been the basis for a whole ‘movement’ ever since. Not that this, in itself, irritates me. No. It’s that, only a few hours ago, i heard someone say that new rave is better than the original Rave movement.

Now, this is the bit where i succumb to my creeping elderly fuddy-dudiness, and admit that i don’t understand the youth of today (as if i ever did). i’ll state that i’m sure Shitdisco are probably nice people but it’s “not my type of thing”, call the dog to fetch my slippers and let the grandchildren huddle ‘round me so i can regale them with tales of lost times, like when CD singles with remixes lasted half and hour and the entire male population was fighting over Justine Frischmann. But i mean, really…new wave versus old rave, and new rave wins?! i know the Klacks put on a decent performance but it’s hardly turning your biggest hit into a machine gun-wielding thrash metal number, dumping a dead sheep at the entrance of the after-party and burning a million quid to celebrate. Heck, it’s not even furiously looping ‘Cloudbusting’ over an euphoric piano/acidic beat. i know i expected the rave revival about as much as i expected Steve Lamacq to move to Radio 2, but they’re not even trying. Which is why i not only feel old, but also feel the need to say embarrassingly lectural in-my-day-lad bollocks like that. But as soon as any of the young whippersnappers deliver something as downright thrilling as the opening cry of “Who loves you, and WHO DO YOU LOVE?!?!?!” at the beginning of ‘Temple of Dreams’, i’ll eat my words without ketchup. Unless it's anything by the newly resurrected Kicks Like A Mule, which doesn't count. Anyway.


Let the music do the talking i guess, step forward old guard:



Utah Saints - ‘Something Good’

The Prodigy - ‘No Good (Start The Dance)’

Messiah - ‘There Is No Law’ (original mix)

The KLF feat. The Children of the Revolution - ‘America: What Time Is Love?’

We got bored, so we ate it

In response to a request from top quality mixtape maker and fellow Sri Erotic Volvo fan Rik, today i present to you my ridiculously unpatented recipe for Chocolate Spaghetti Cake. Please note that the measurements of each ingredient are to the maker’s discretion.

Assemble: spaghetti; rice; cooking chocolate; milkshake powder; prepared cake flan; whipped cream; digestive biscuits; banana; chocolate drops; hundreds and thousands.
Cook the spaghetti and rice together for a few minutes longer than recommended on the packet to ensure softness and fork until fluffy (avoid stodginess). Drain if excess water remains. Mix in the cooking chocolate while the mixture is still hot and the milkshake powder (or syrup like Crusha for moistness if you prefer). Once thoroughly mixed allow to cool. Form in a mound on the flan until sturdy enough to slice and cover with the cream, then arrange the bananas, chocolate drops, digestives and hundreds/thousands. Party ‘til you puke.

i couldn’t really think of any cake-based songs to put with this, so here’s something to wash it down with.



Gwenno – Lime Chordial

We’ve been a bit late in picking up on the solo efforts from Gwenno, one of the three pleasant ones from that Bananarama tribute act we mentioned earlier. Those on the wrong side of the Pips debate – i.e. the people who don’t like them – should note that Gwenno in her own words likens the songs to both Ace of Base and The Postal Service, but i think even that’s doing her a disservice. Looking forward to the album. Thanks to Simon for sending the track.

With the volume up and the windows down

It’s good to know words just aren’t enough sometimes. One of the absolute stand-out albums of last year, Leave Now For Adventure, had only eight words in it, and i can’t even remember them properly. i think that’s very telling, not when it comes to my occasionally lacklustre memory, but regarding the sharpest, shiniest, most potent noises. Some people are just better wordless.

The aforementioned Feedle long-player came out last year in a digital sense (£3, kids) on SVC Records, which, as eager mp3 aficionados may realise, is the imprint wing of masterful weblog Spoilt Victorian Child. (If you click on that link RIGHT NOW you’ll not only see a heart-warming-as-artery-cardigans photograph of Peelie and Gedge on ‘This Is Your Life’ but also a little bit of writing about The Greatest 7” Single Of All Time). However, this week saw the re-release of Leave Now For Adventure on Illicit Recordings, in a proper physical digipak look-you-can-get-it-in-the-shops(-if-you-ask-them-to-order-it) CD format and everything. You can buy for Not Much Monies at Norman Records, see?

If i controlled radio stations worldwide i’d make sure they played you this straight away.



Feedle – Song For Dogs

Worth getting if you think you’d like 65daysofstatic without the guitars, i think you’ll agree. There’s even a malicious rumour that Feedle used to be in 65dos which would make a lot of sense, but we do know that at the very least they are mutual admirers and keen buddies.

65daysofstatic – Aren’t We All Running? (Feedle remix)

Speaking of which! Not only does Feedle re-return, but a new 65daaaaaaaays album is due upon us. In the UK here, the rest of Europe over there and the US in the other direction, you’ll all have to wait until 30th April for ‘The Destruction Of Small Ideas’ on the marvellous Monotreme Records (you’ve got to admire a label that names itself after one of these little buggers). Japan get it a week earlier on Zankyo Records, which is nice, and if you can’t wait that long you can listen to them live in Austin if you visit the Lounge Acts page at Texan radio station WOXY.

AND (deep breath) the single ‘Don’t Go Down To Sorrow’ will precede the LP, which i’ve just noticed will include a remix of ‘The Major Cities Of The World Are Being Destroyed One By One By The Monsters’ on the b-side. Ace-o.



i’ve got a wealth of 65days stories, none of them particularly interesting to anyone but me i suspect. However, a word of advice, this goes down well in clubs:

65daysofstatic – born apart

Do YSI?

Bearsuit – Hei Joska, Hei Jokkunen
Listen With Sarah – Ramblin’ Andy
Ergo Phizmiz – Sticky White Glue (extract): Rectify
Coco Electrik – Apple Pie (Skylab remix)
Easy Star All Stars feat. Morgan Heritage – Electioneering
The Schla La Las – Hot As Possible
Now – The Incase
Yaporigami – Yamato
The Retro Spankees! – Mr Brilliant
KateGoes - Yoyo
Misty’s Big Adventure – Fighting For My Life
Misty’s Big Adventure - Microwave
Misty’s Big Adventure – The Whaleians
Ziggy Bollus – 50 Seconds Of Love (radio edit)
Ziggy Bollus – Biscuit City
Ziggy Bollus – Vitamin Dee Dee (wishpigmentation)
The Stranglers – Walk On By
Coin-Op – Democracies
Chris T-T – Eminem Is Gay
Chris T-T – The Tin Man
The Singing Adams – Minus Nines
The Broken Family Band – You’re Like a Woman
Lost Penguin – Mr Whippy
Lightning Bolt – 13 Monsters
Pagan Wanderer Lu – Our New Hospital Sucks

Annals Retentive: 2005

Eurgh, Sunday.

Sweeping The Nation said something very kind about us but it also doubles up as evidence of another unsatisfied customer regarding Wiki Upload. i’d like to inform readers (uhm, hi?) that this use of wiki is not really through preference, but more because it appeared to keep all files for an indefinite period of time for free and wouldn’t hassle visitors with pop-ups about some casino with computer-animated wannabe neo-rat-packers slyly taking dollar off you, or porn. Turns out the catch is that nobody can download the bloody files.

This is probably an apt time to tell you that i’m not a technophobe, i’m just incompetent. i don’t hate technology, yet technology seems to at the very least think i’m a bit of a knob. So from now on, i’ll be doing what i know, i.e. sticking all files that i can’t link to directly on YSI and then if you the viewer want any of the files that have run out we can either stick them up again or e-mail them to you. We’ve got a week to think about it anyway so hold your horses. (They might be lonely.)

Where was i? Oh yes.

Did i say that 2006 was my worst year on record? Now, that was very self-indulgently and disgustingly 3mo of me. Particularly as 2005 was worse. i jest, of course, 2005 wasn’t particularly bad per se – we’ve all got access to electricity, clean water, warmth, companionship, open skies, abundant medicine, decent meals and the new Robyn single, let’s have a little perspective here – it’s just that other years were particularly better. Anyway, most of my memories of 2005 are happy ones, particularly 12th July for reasons too happifying to go into now, and 9th/10th/11th September for being the weekend i was an attendant at my favourite festival line-up ever.

There were great songs too.



Magoo – Robot Twin

The first truly great album of 2005 arrived on the doormat at the end of 2004 in a Christmas card from Norwich. The album was called Pop Songs, although really with it being a double-CD release that only resulted in eight songs it was difficult to really know what to call it. It was, it transpired, a stop-gap of sorts, re-announcing Magoo as an album band after four years of LP-release dormancy since 2001’s Realist Week. (The follow up, The All Electric Amusement Arcade, didn’t appear until June last year). As well as the awe-striking joy and depth of the music, one thing that i absolutely adore about the album is its title. Pop Songs. Go on, say it to yourself. Pop Songs. Pop Songs. It’d be great if it was really an album of discordant abrasive concrete noise collages but as it actually is an album of pop songs, there’s really something very…satisfying about it. Pop Songs. i don’t know why nobody had thought of it before. Pop Songs.



This Et Al – All You’ll Ever Be Is A Dancer

This Et Al were another lot that sent me a great deal of releases and information at a time when bands from Leeds (UK) were quite hot property with the indie cognoscenti, yet being on the Dance To The Radio label meant they were, and are, forever in the shadow of ¡Forward, Russia! who, despite the odd cracking tune and a natty song-titling system, never made (and judging by their new material, probably never will make) anything as frantic and frenetic and bitter or better than ‘All You’ll Ever Be Is A Dancer’. This is the track that i place blame on for my current year-old habit of having to listen to certain songs on a loop several times over just because one spin isn’t enough and, by crikey, i still try and hit that high note on the last chorus. And to think this was a b-side.

Alter Ego Distort – Statements Galore

Along with a wealth of local bands like The Sways, Alter Ego Distort were another pleasant surprise that found their way through the letterbox (not literally, it was a demo of their EP ‘…in all oceans now’) all the way from Sweden. Sadly i can’t tell you anything about what they’re up to now as their official website has disappeared from cyberspace and their delicate yet soaring indiepop uber-tunes never even got a proper release. Injustice, much?



Saint Etienne – Teenage Winter

i adore Saint Etienne (and their website) and have done since barely older than toddler age, gawping a gap-toothed smile at the delight of ‘You’re In A Bad Way’ oozing from the car stereo. Which is why 2005’s Tales From Turnpike House rather disappointed me – well, that and David Essex. i even ended up having a lengthy e-mail correspondence debate with a 50-year-old backing vocalist called Ingemar Gustavsson (who i think may have even been on the album) about how everybody trying to do Beach Boys harmonies at that time (this was quite shortly after the eventual release of Smile, you see, hence it was en vogue) were just going to sound inferior, even the Et. ‘Teenage Winter’ however made up for all of it; it was bleak, forlorn, melancholic to the point of misery, bursting with regret and i couldn’t get enough of it. It was probably too close to the bone – i know where that Sainsbury’s is, i know the second hand shop that is suffering from eBay’s success and i definitely know those Christmas cards you can’t bear to throw away. But on a happy note, their appearance at the aforementioned Bestival, particularly the glorious closing rendition of ‘He’s On The Phone’ played to a crowd of enraptured C86 fanatics was a highlight in a weekend of highlights.



Talking of Bestival another artist there was Kid Carpet who i missed because he clashed with Super Furries and frankly there was no contest. i did however see his DJ set where in between spinning his own records and bits of 2 Many DJs bootlegs he ‘played out’ the likes of ‘Rah Rah Rasputin’ and ‘Who’s Afraid Of The Big Bad Wolf?’ If i had his b-side ‘£1500 and a Bus Apology’ or the superlative ‘Bristol Carpet Factory’ on me i’d play you those, but instead you can have the cover version that a lot of people remember him for:

Kid Carpet – Jump



It was a very indie year it seems, but there was little more…oh go on then…twee than Pete Dale’s collection of songs with his band Milky Wimpshake. As an example, here are three versions of a song about love and The Beatles, and one minute-long punk song about a milkshake taster. Yep.

Milky Wimpshake – My Heart Beats Faster Than Techno (live version)
Milky Wimpshake – My Heart Beats Faster Than Techno (7” version)
Milky Wimpshake – My Heart Beats Faster Than Techno (French version)
Milky Wimpshake – Milk Maid

i’ll leave you with a rather muddy representation of quite possibly the most exciting moment of live music i witnessed in 2005, particularly the moment just before the vocals start. Hold on tight:

A Cookie Is A Sometimes Food

Hi there. Sorry we lost touch the past few days. i'd love to say that personally it's because i've been busy doing work of immense beneficial consequence to the rest of mankind but really by day i’ve been standing around doing ‘art pieces’ that involve wearing gas masks and pretending to be a corrupt accountant, by evening writing a thesis on why Disneyland is the most important art installation of the late twentieth century and by evening playing Beatbox Saboteurs records to eighth-full clubs of disinterested students before stumbling around Brighton seafront with the word ‘MASK!’ written on my face. Bianca has been very busy doing more important medical research and, if she wasn’t at this very moment a-sleeping and dreaming her enviably vibrant dreams, i’m sure she’d say a cheery hello.

Now, have you ever taken a personal psychology test? To see through a set of drawings or ink splodges and your interpretation of such whether you are either a well-adjusted upstanding member of society or a raging ball of psychopathic unpleasantness simply choosing to keep it in at the moment? Well, you’ve no need, because i can now judge your inner being using simply some Johnny Cash, Sesame Street characters and nifty html.

Just relax, watch these two videos and tell me afterwards which one you prefer. Your results will be processed shortly.





Chosen? Me too. i chose the latter. i’ve even had an mp3 of it on rotation (mp3s can rotate, right?) for the past coupl’a days. Bad move. i’m quite obviously unhinged, sadistic or just plain not-nice, siding with the Grouch like that. Look at ‘Don’t Take Your Ones To Town’: it’s sweet, dammit. It’s not only got a moral message in it, it removes the original message about unsavoury firearms violence and uses it to teach kids about the importance of numeracy. It has a comedy sound effect in it. And Cash is even polite to all the characters, especially the ones that (being vampires) have probably just got back from draining a virgin dry of their blood supply through their soft pale necks. He’s not curling his lip at a Jim Henson creation and going all shifty-eyed like he would rather be at the bar but doesn’t want anyone to notice. ‘Nasty Dan’ comes to the conclusion that being an utter bell-end your entire life will land you in unscrupulous happiness, and i can’t stop listening to it. Plus he’s wearing a denim jacket. What sort of sick freak must i be?

As we’re on the subject of Sesame Street, here’s one of the myriad reasons why new rave will never really better old rave, not even in the early-Nineties nonsensical sense. Enjoy.